I hate romance, and love, opening up to someone is impossible, Marriage is a dirty word, and I would rather see the new Paranormal Activity than that RomCom Katherine Heigl’s in. I guess its a bad thing that I’m so involved with my best friend. She says she loves me, She wants to be with me forever, but I don’t understand it.
It scares the crap outta me. Last night I had a break down, I was screaming and crying, and ended up carving the hell out of my arm. It says some crazy things. Like:
“I hate myself.”
(And of course) “Fear of Being Loved”
I didn’t really remember much of it afterward, but it was enough to scare her to the point of shaking and tears. I need to figure this out, this is my best friend here.