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I don’t get it

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I don’t get it …

Every time I like someone, it’s never reciprocal. I always want guys I can’t have, usually I spend some weeks fantasizing and then when I clearly see that he’s not interested I move on after some time and the story stops here. But this time, its seems different, this time I feel like I have the possibility to fall in love, it has never been an option with the others I knew it. But this time, even when everyone told me to give up, that he doesn’t and will never like me I just didn’t want to listen. When he asked me out I was like a little girl, I was so happy, I couldn’t hide it, just like I couldn’t hide my feeling while before. But now that he left me after less than just … (you won’t know) I realised that I might always be in that schema. Me liking someone, and him, ignoring or playing me.

I’m tired of all that, the worst is that I don’t want to forget my “””ex”””” (can’t stand to call him like this, grrraa !) I know I have to, I need to forget him but it’s hard. I feeling less and less sad everyday but still … He said he does that because he doesn’t want to hurt me but … HELLO ! You are ALREADY hurting me

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